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Thursday, September 29, 2005

Roberts Confirmed, Asks, "Where will I sit?"

By: Matthew Simcox

Washington, D.C. -- Sitting in the White House Roosevelt Room with the President and First Lady Bush, John Roberts got to watch 100 senators vote for or against his becoming the 17th chief justice of the Supreme Court of the United States - or SCOTUS for short.

The final tally was 44 - 16, Miami (OH) over Cincinnati. Then, the President changed the channel from SportsCenter to Fox News for the confirmation tally. That final tally was 78 - 22, yeses over nos. Each of the Republican Senators and half of the Democrat Senators voted for the Confirmation of John Roberts.

At "yes" vote number 51, the Roosevelt room erupted in raucous laughter and the ginger ale was uncorked and the juice was flowing -- yes, at 11:30 in the morning. Chief Justice Roberts reportedly slapped the President on the back and exclaimed, "YES! Thank you, Mr. President."

The party quieted down a little bit for the conclusion of the vote, but it was clear that no one really cared after "yes" vote number 51.

Once all the dust settled, and the votes were in, new CJ Roberts was heard asking President Bush, "Where will I sit?"

Typically, the newest member of the SCOTUS sits at one of the far ends of the bench and moves inward with seniority. But Roberts should have known that as Chief Justice he would be in the center. Robert's reply to the answer: "But I'm not a centrist, I'm a leftist."

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